So one of my resolutions in 2015 is to actually be myself again. Doing things like dressing up more instead of letting me become a hobo, actually clean my room weekly, and try to maintain a balance of doing my chores instead of piling them up. Also, try exploring back things that I used to do, like writing this blog and take a look around and see what other bloggers are doing...

Seems like 2014 is really a bad year for some. I was like thinking, "Is 2014 jinxed?"

I myself have my own set of problems in 2014 when I started my new job. Location, salary and the trustworthiness of some people. Then there's my grandfather's condition.

So again, I sincerely pray to all of you who are having a bad 2014, let bygones be bygones, and may the new year bring you love and joy. Cut some limes, wash yourself with flower water, jump over a fire, and do just whatever you may need to cast away all these negativity.

Start fresh and start anew, it isn't too late to do so.

I wanted to post this some time ago, but here it is. In this post, it's referring to bags. High-end designer bags.

If you know me long and well enough, you'd notice I'm one of those gays labeled as "fashionistas". Unfortunately, my life isn't that exciting and although I love fashion (and own some), I hardly chance upon the times where I could dress myself to the nines. It's more of a "all dressed up and nowhere to go" scenario. So you'll mostly find me in t-shirts and shorts, or even tanks, with messy hair.

But enough about me. The reason what motivated to write this is because I came across a post from a blogger about brand recognition and the value of a designer bag. Why a piece made from the part of a dead animal can cost so much that you can feed a malnourished family in Africa for a year (This is what my grandmum will say about my habit. I acknowledge it as my hobby)?

Let me try to educate you all with my certain level of knowledge about the fashion industry and the love of all things designer.

Let's try to dissect this by using a Louis Vuitton Neverfull in PM. It's the rhombus tote with two straps at the side that you can see almost everywhere (yes, everywhere). PM here refers to the smallest size available for this tote, which is around the size of a B4 paper (considering only the body, minus straps). This will set you back around USD1140, or RM4000, more or less, depending on where you are buying this tote.

(The Louis Vuitton Neverfull PM used to be USD 770, or around RM 2500, a few years back, but more on this later.)

The Neverfull is made from high quality canvas (not leather), with a lining in fuschia textile (colour of lining has its variations, depending on the size model) for the monogrammed version. It's trimmed with vachetta leather, which means untreated leather and is susceptible to water stains and dirt. Over time, the trimming will age into a honey brown colour. This is called a patina. The hardware is made of brass with a gold tone. It's not gold plated and will tarnish over time. Also, the bag is reversible, which means you can turn the bag inside out and use it.

Now, considering the materials of the bag, do you think it's worth it? If not, then what are you paying for exactly? Well, note that although each bag is not exactly hand stitched (some parts are, some parts aren't, depending on the complexity of the design), it is a handmade product. Fine skills are required and the people who do this are called artisans. So some part of your money goes to their salary.

Now what about advertisements? Louis Vuitton features an ad campaign for every collection that they produce so some part of the money goes to the advertisers and models who did the campaign. If you buy this in a boutique, part of your money goes to the sales assistants too. And so on.

But the most important thing that you did when you made your choice to buy the bag is that you are supporting the creative thoughts that are put into that bag. It's like supporting your favourite singer by buying their original albums.

Another important point is brand recognition. Almost everybody recognises the Louis Vuitton monogram and the value that it is associated with i.e. luxury. This increases the brand's value. Take note that Louis Vuitton has a price increase period every now and then to make their products seem more precious and unattainable (Therefore you can see why they jacked up their prices by 50% in a period of a few years).

Why they are doing so? People will still buy them due to the value of the brand. Another brand that's notorious for their price increase is Chanel. You can check out online resellers for Chanel bags that the pricing for a used one is similar to a brand new one. They hold their value, and if you're lucky enough, your used Chanel bag may even be worth more than the amount you first bought it.

But as a conclusion, after all has been said, the reason why people (and me, of course) like to buy designer goods is because of the quality. I can assure you that a Louis Vuitton Neverfull or a Chanel 2.55 will definitely last and gives you value when you calculate it by cost-per-use. I bought enough bags from high-street brands to realise that my high-street bag will only last a year or two, but my designer item will last me long enough until I feel like selling it away.

Oh, and about fake designer goods? I do know that what they are producing are very, very close to the original items, but the way that the item is made is not up to ethical standards. Child labour, unsanitary working conditions, associations with gangs and such surrounds the production of fake designer goods.

If you are ever, ever tempted to do so, please do not buy a fake designer item. There are a lot more contemporary designers that can fit your budget e.g. Coach and Longchamp, providing quality and easing your wallet.

I'm not trying to promote brands, or having a say in what bag you are using, but different people have different tastes and different ways of using their money. Some people like my father spends a tonne on his fish pond and cars, and I'm saving part of my hard-earned money into buying what I love.

Whichever thing that rocks your boat, folks.

This is one movie that I'd really like to watch.



And I've missed my blog. I guess it's time to write again.

And I barely know where should I start.

My grand aunt passed away and this is my first time sending someone till the end, going through all the last rites. I didn't even did that when my grandma and grandpa on my mother's side passed away.

I went to Jennifer Lopez's concert. Amazing performer and entertainer, certainly not a singer. And yes, I can see why her booty is insured for that amount of money.

I went to USS, or Universal Studios Singapore. Had lots of fun with my swan prince.

I found out that the KFC in Singapore is not worth eating. Hot and Spicy is neither hot or spicy, just a crispier version of the Original.

I still haven't find a job despite all the applications I've sent and the interviews that I've attended. It's hard finding a job here.

After coming down to Singapore, I appreciate and love my country even more. People here are so sad and so scared it makes me think about the saying, "The grass is always greener on the other side." We may not have money but we are indeed happier than them in a way.  

That's it for now. Until next time till I write again.

It's been some time since I posted anything, with all the work, emotional stress, moving back to my hometown, and basically, being busy about life itself.

Yup, so I made the decision to go to the island down south, that is Singapore, after many months of deliberation.

Thank you so much Tuls for your comment. I am touched and I appreciate the fact that you took time to write it. :) I took the road less taken, for me that is, but not the road not taken.

In case you are wondering why this decision is so important, it is because if I am to go there, the chances of working in the same career path that I've been studying for so long is almost nil. And I am now a Bachelor in Graphic Design and Multimedia.

The other reason why I choose to go there is because I really, really want to have my own house before I reach 30. If you are suggesting the new gahmen scheme for people who haven't own a house yet, let me just say, I am aware of how my country's financial state is.

With the kind of pay that I'm getting here, it's not helping at all. Sure, I can have a main job and do part-time jobs on the side, but I want to have holidays and other little luxuries of life too. Then there are going to be bills to pay. I'm trying to work smart here, to support my dream and to achieve the kind of lifestyle that I would like to have.

I do hope I can achieve my dream. And then get married, maybe.

I'll be leaving in a week's time. Wish me luck.

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry, I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth.

...I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference.

I think most of you have heard of this poem, but if you have not, then this excerpt is taken from the poem named "The Road Not Taken" by Robert Frost. It's exactly describing what I'm going through right now.

Should I, or should I not? The less traveled by? Which road is the less traveled by? I see both are trodden with enough soil and dirt, not a single petal of rose in sight.

Sometimes both seems equally bright, but sometimes both seems equally dim.

This may be the biggest decision in my life for the time being. My career is at stake! But once chosen, there's no turning back.

I can only pray.

Or at least some of us were some kind of a eunuch in our past life. It is very amazing to know that the hearts of gay men are more or less the same, having a more or less the same behaviour, and a more or less the same interests. For an example, having a soft spot for beauty, talking with hand gestures, and being a bit bitchy at times. I do know that we are all different in our own ways, but it's some of these traits that makes our gaydar go "ping".

So if we are to ask science to explain why this is so, certainly the answer is still not here yet. But if you do believe in reincarnation and karma, well, somehow it does make sense at times.

If you do read back the history of how eunuchs came to be, certainly there are more eunuchs than what history recorded. Even for the Ming dynasty in China, there were about 70,000 eunuchs serving the imperial family at one time. The Koreans back then did have eunuchs too, as well as the Ottoman empire. To read more about eunuchs, click here.

Of course this is only a passing thought with no concrete evidence. On the other hand, when boys are castrated when they are young, of course the body loses its source to produce testosterone. Then similar features are seen in all of them, like having a higher pitched voice and smoother facial features.

I know not all gay men have a high pitched voice and smooth facial features, but having them add points to the gaydar. So that's the reason why I suddenly had this passing thought.

But about castration, I personally think that even though I am not physically castrated, but my mind already is. Some time back when I saw this documentary from Nat Geo, it did said homosexuality is caused by one of the genes is switched off, causing changes to the brain and therefore affects the gender that we are attracted to.

Isn't this some form of castration, by removing my supposedly sexual attraction and gender role that I should have?  I do admit that I can be very in touch with my feminine side at times.

Just a passing thought, just a passing thought. You're most welcomed if you do not want to comment at all, because this is indeed a very, very weird thought that I am having now. I'm just pouring it out for the sake of retaining my sanity. 

This is the question that most of us gay men have to go through before we truly accept ourselves.

For some people, it's through a happy experience, like knowing that they like to dress up in their mother's clothes or play with make up, and then there are those with a not so happy experience, like falling in love with a straight friend. Twice.

Then there are those with a really really dark past, as in being sexually molested while he's still a child. This happened to an extremely close friend of mine. He says this is the reason why he is attracted to men. He labels himself as a bisexual.

The story was that when he was still a child, sometimes he will be sent over to his aunt house to be taken care of. And that's where it happened. His cousin brother did it to him.

I also happen to know who is his cousin brother too. Never I will see him in the same light again. To know that he actually molested a child! And actually ruined his psychological well being!

To me, there is none other sin greater than theft. All other sins are an evolution of it. In this case, he robbed him of his chance to actually discover his sexuality in a much, much healthier way.

I despise such people. Children are meant to be taken care of, to be nurtured, and to be loved. What he did was the ultimatum.

I spit on you and I hope karma will take its place. I'll be sitting here to watch the show.

There's this new app called Between, which is actually a social networking app between two people. More specifically, it's for you and your partner only. It's from this Korean company called VCNC.

Basically the app distills down the essence of the question, "Why do we use technology?" Well, to communicate with people.

I'm now using it with my boyfriend. It's actually quite fun to use because you can document down your relationship and make it look something like Facebook's timeline. Also, it incorporates a messaging service like Viber or WhatsApp so if you're a fan of those, it's worth looking into.

I think it will benefit most for couples who are in a long distance relationship. Especially when you want to share sweet nothings with your significant other but not with other people.

I personally think it's a nice app overall. In the future, they're going to team up with other local businesses so that they can offer discount vouchers or coupons that are targeted towards couples.

Give it a try with your significant other. The app is available on Apple and Android.

Click here to know more about the app.

This game was invented by my friend and I just rewrite all the instructions in words. :)

Little Frankie, one of my family's little dogs, passed away recently due to an allergic reaction towards his medication.

It's really heartbreaking to see him having seizures every half an hour. Not even anti-seizures medication can help. I remembered holding him in my arms and another seizure occurs. My eyes gets watery at once. I can see how painful it is for him and yet he couldn't say a thing.

But he is at a happier place now. Rest in peace, Frankie. Do reincarnate at a better place and time, as a better being. We all love you very much. 

Today I visited a bear cafe in KL. I think it's the only one around and if you don't know where it is, it's in Miharja. Khun is the name of the place. So what I'm doing there? Celebrating a friend's birthday! If you came across this post, happy birthday once again, T!

By the way, he's the only friend that can handle a bear hug. And to give one too. A bone breaking, chest squeezing hug is what I call a bear hug. My bf says that I do not know my own strength and always squeezed him to hard. Oops.

So in that whole establishment today, I think I'm the only guy who weighs less than 70kg and shorter than 170cm. I feel so small among all these super-sized men. Which is quite intimidating at first. And I think I may have spotted a junior at my university there too. It's such a small circle.

Talking about the place, Khun is tastefully done to accommodate such gatherings. There's enough space to move and mingle around, and to think that it also houses a sauna too. And until this moment, I haven't stepped into one before, though being so near to it.

In conclusion, it's just a short and sweet birthday party for the birthday boy. Oh, and the durian cheesecake was heavenly. As sinful as it gets, I think I can actually wolf down a quarter of the cake.

That's it for now. And there will be bear pics on the next post. It's been a while since I posted any. :)